When it comes time to go on a date, many of us are aware of all the obvious things to be mindful of going into it. We know that it’s important to shower, dress nicely, be on time and arrive prepared with a cool story to share or two. But what about the less obvious traits that people will notice, and be impressed by? Here are 5 not so obvious qualities that you may not have thought of yet, that will definitely impress your date:
1. Drink booze slowly, or don’t drink it at all
It’s extremely common to drink too much too fast on a date. Alcohol loosens us up, and considering how nervous most of us are on those first few dates, it’s that we’d want our server to keep the drinks coming. However, I recently went on a date with someone who ordered a beer, and 45 minutes into our date, his glass was still half full. He was still on his first beer. He stood out because of his ability to enjoy spending time with me sober. He didn’t need booze to loosen his nerves, and he didn’t seem to need booze to have fun. It made me realize how many of my dates were the exact opposite. If you make it known that you have no hidden agendas that you think booze might enable, and no need to get wasted in order to enjoy yourself, you’ll stand out in a really great way.
2. Ask real questions
This is a big one. Don’t just ask your date about their job, their dog or what they like to do for fun. If you really want to stand out and impress your date, ask some real questions. Ask about their goals, dreams, fears, passions and proudest achievements. Showing a genuine interest in your date will go a long away, and people tend to light up when they’re discussing what’s most important in their life such as their goals and their passions. These are the memorable and stimulating types of conversations that real connections are built on.
3. Get closer.
If things are going well, that is. If the date is going great (usually you can tell when it is) then don’t hesitate to break down that barrier of distance across the table. Reach out and squeeze your date’s hand, or if there’s room you could even switch seats to sit next to them in order to get a little closer. This helps create intimacy, which is crucial if the two of you are going to see each other in a romantic light.
4. Mirror them
Mirroring your date’s actions and mannerisms is just plain smart. If he or she is speaking quietly, for example, it could be for a reason. Maybe they’re uncomfortable with loud or raised voices, or they value their privacy. Mirror them by speaking in a similar soft tone instead of making things awkward by talking back loudly. If your date is leaning in while they speak to you, mirror their body language by leaning in closer as well, to show that the interest is mutual. If your date laughs, don’t just stare at them blankly – which leads me to my next tip.
This final tip isn’t as obvious as it should be. We need to smile more on dates! Sometimes we forget to smile when we’re nervous, or overthinking a situation. Some of us have resting bitch face – and others look serious when they’re listening intently. That’s all fine, but your date will find you much more attractive if you smile – and better yet, laugh!